Yesterday, found me on my hands and knees, going through all of my clothes and critically assessing what my needs are and what they will be. I really only want to own 7 changes of clothes. Anything more is just, well...more. So, I whittled and will continue whittling each group of my belongings until they are just perfect for my needs. Man, it feels good not to be weighed down by my "stuff"!
I'm also doing this in preparation for the fact that I might not be coming back once I board the plane on July 15, 2011! It's a heavy thought that can sometimes be crushing but God's grace also abounds greatly in my heart and gives me boldness to put one foot in front of the other. He is the One I run to. He is the One I am chasing!
The song, Come Away With Me, by Nora Jones pops into my head as I ponder my next steps. That is what I hear God singing over me. I have personally witnessed just how incredibly jealous God is for our hearts, and not just part of our hearts, but the whole. In light of all of the hurt and betrayal I have felt from earthly relationships, God has shown me just how trustworthy, faithful, and over the moon in love with me He is.
How could I NOT follow Him to the ends of the earth!?1
I have cried out to Him over my lifetime to refine me and make me into His image. Each year, I have seen Him do that very thing. This year, He has intensified the flames. Some days, the very heat from His presence makes me cry out in pain, while on other days, I find myself able to crawl into His lap and fall asleep.
I think it is very fitting that He would challenge me by taking me to a foreign land and ask me to trust Him to be my Provider. It just makes sense to me. It just fits because He knows me. He knows that when I get comfortable, I settle. He wants more just as He knows my heart yearns for more.
Father, continue to speak so that I know Your voice more than any other. Strengthen my heart so that I do not quake, but trust when You ask me to act. I place my life completely in Your hands for You are worthy!
I love you all and I hope this sharing of my heart and adventure encourages you and gives you hope for the great things to come in your own lives!
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